MEDIA ANNOUNCEMENT
For Immediate Release

May 28, 2008

JIM CATHCART – WELL-KNOWN BUSINESS GURU AND PROFESSIONAL SPEAKER – ACCEPTS APPOINTMENT OF SENIOR ADVISOR AND SPOKESPERSON FOR SYNERGYSTREET.COM

Charlotte, NC – Tony Holden, founder of a new social networking site for business owners and entrepreneurs at www.SynergyStreet.com, has announced that Mr. Jim Cathcart has accepted the appointment of Senior Advisor and Spokesperson for SynergyStreet.

Jim Cathcart, CSP, CPAE, one of the most widely recognized professional speakers in the world, is founder and president of Cathcart Institute, Inc. and an advisor to the Schools of Business at Pepperdine University and California Lutheran University. As the author of 14 books and scores of recorded programs, his students number in the hundreds of thousands. He is a past president of the National Speakers Association (NSA), winner of the Cavett Award, member of the Speaker Hall of Fame (CPAE), Certified Speaking Professional (CSP), a member of the exclusive Speakers Roundtable, 20 of the world’s top speakers, and, in the year 2001, recipient of the Golden Gavel Award from Toastmasters International.

How SynergyStreet got connected with Jim Cathcart:
“Jim Cathcart is a master of growing High-Value Relationships. His own career is a reflection of this. When you list the names of the top speakers and authors in the business community you are also naming Jim’s contacts list. He’s in their address book and they are in his. I’ve seen him in action since 1989 and have been impressed with how widely admired he is among his colleagues and customers. He has received just about every honor that is bestowed upon professional speakers.”

Page Two
“Jim’s level of integrity, business acumen and reputation are what SynergyStreet wants for everyone. We know of no one more qualified to represent our community in the marketplace. We are thrilled that he has agreed to represent us as our Spokesperson and Senior Advisor. We encourage everyone to acquaint themselves with Jim by checking out his profile, blog and links to the storehouse of valuable information he has provided to the community at large and through his professional services as a speaker, author and trusted advisor.” –said Tony Holden, Founder & CEO of SynergyStreet.com

What Jim Cathcart has to say about SynergyStreet: “Today is the day for you to connect with as many trusted friends as you can and SynergyStreet is the place to do it. We grew up thinking that ‘Knowledge is Power’ and then discovered that the internet makes most knowledge available to everyone. So where is Power today? It is TRUST. The person with the most trust and acceptance among others is the person with the most power to succeed. Nobody makes it alone; we all need each other more than ever. “

“With SynergyStreet you now have a system within which you can connect and collaborate easily and safely. As you build your own community of trusted colleagues and friends you expand your capacity for success. Our goal at SynergyStreet is to make it easy and fun for you to conduct business and grow friendships. Our focus is bringing you Commerce, Community and Collaboration to expand your potential to succeed.”

Page Three
Cathcart Institute, Inc. has published a wide variety of learning resources in the area of human development. All of these are available as live in-person training programs as well as published works. Topics covered include: Sales Skills, Leadership, Professional Development, Self Improvement, Relationship Skills, Public Speaking, Self Motivation, Managing People, Psychology, Personality Styles, Sales Management, Marketing, Customer Relations, Customer Service Strategies, Strategic Planning, and Communication Skills.

Speech Topics include: Relationship Intelligence ™, All Leadership Begins With Self Leadership, Relationship Selling™, The Acorn Principle™: (Helping People Grow), Guaranteeing Lifetime Customer Loyalty, and Behavioral Economics: Every Action Has A Value or A Cost.

Jim Cathcart’s works are published by the world’s top publishers: St. Martin’s Press, Leading Authorities Press, Dartnell, Penguin Putnam, Macmillan India, Prentice Hall, Nightingale Conant and the University of Southern California. Relationship Selling is now translated into Chinese, Japanese, German and Finnish. Jim’s works are available in print, on DVD, CD and online.

SynergyStreet considers Jim Cathcart to be exactly the kind of person who belongs on SynergyStreet.com and we welcome him as he welcomes you to our community. As Jim often says, “Join us and let’s discover just how much more successful you can be!”
End

Caption: Jim Cathcart – Senior Advisor & Spokesperson to SynergyStreet.com
www.synergystreet.com
For further information on this announcement contact:
Dianne Stewart
BSA Public Relations & Marketing
704 .844 .1064 / 704 .777 .4842
Di@BSAPR.biz

by Jim Cathcart

The quickest way to assure that a relationship has high value is to GIVE high value to it.
By that I mean contributing value to the other person. If you want to be seen as important to them then they need to see and feel the benefits that come from staying connected with you. It’s is the “pay it forward” concept of giving before you expect to receive.

You can guarantee 100% customer loyalty in your business when you practice it this way.
Decide today that you will GIVE customer loyalty to all who do business with you. Don’t wait for them to be loyal to you, just start right now to treat them with commitment and continuing loyalty. If they never buy from you again, at least they will speak well of you and be impressed by your dedication to them as a customer. More often, they will become more loyal to you as well. People do business with those who show that they care.

When you call a company to inquire about how they can solve your problem, you don’t care nearly as much about their product quality, service reputation or expertise (at first) as you do about whether they care about helping you get your solution.
I once called a phone company to have an error corrected on my bill. After going through what seemed like thirty layers of “voice mail jail” I finally reached a technician who could solve the problem. But he seemed to be much more concerned about the process than the outcome. He kept saying, “you should have…” until finally I interrupted him. I said, “I know this is frustrating to you as it is annoying to me. How about just transferring me to someone who cares?”
He was stunned. He said, “I care!” I replied, “I couldn’t tell. It seemed to me that you were more bothered by what I had not done in the past than what could be done now to make things right.”
His tone changed completely and he assured me that his desire was to correct the situation. And he did. Ahhhhh! Finally we got past the process and focused on the result.

What we are all seeking in business dealings is someone who seems truly interested in filling our needs rather than scolding us about what “should” have happened. “Should have” is mostly useless. You can’t do anything with it. It doesn’t correct the situation nor does it improve the relationship. It merely lays blame and seeks guilt in response. So, let’s stop the insanity and start today to GIVE our loyalty to all our customers. The more we give the more we will tend to get. It’s the surest bet for customer retention out of all the things you could do.

To build High-Value Relationships begin to give more value to others each day. You can control what you give but you cannot control what they give. So pay it forward and enjoy the loyalty!
For more on this topic see Relationship Selling at Cathcart.com.

By Jim Cathcart

Two days ago I was in Las Vegas for a speech on “Relationship Intelligence ™” to the Chamber of Commerce at their beautiful new offices in the Towne Center complex. Sweet. Good venue, great people and a very good experience all around.

The night before my speech I stayed at the Rio Hotel and Resort. I dined alone and during my delightful dinner it occurred to me that somebody was going to become the luckiest person in Las Vegas that night. So, I figured that it might as well be me.

Now, I’m not much of a gambler, nor did I have a big wad of cash with which I could play the odds, so I just took my “I’m lucky tonight” attitude and wandered the casino for a while. Finally one slot machine caught my eye and I invested $20 in it. On my third “spin” it paid off! $100.
So I hit “cash out” and took my winnings for a walk. Then I stopped at a second machine, inserted $20 and won $60. Cashed out again and walked. The third machine accepted my $20 bill and promptly returned $50 to me. Machine number four gave me $55. This was getting really interesting.

I placed $50 of my new winnings on a bet at the Roulette table and lost. I considered placing another bet but I didn’t “feel” lucky, so…
I retired for the night. Just stopped gambling and went to my room.
Now you might be saying, “Jim, you need a better story. This one just stops cold.”
But consider for a minute that I went to bed with “house money” in my pocket. Granted, it wasn’t much but it was more than I had spent.
Consider further that I heeded the instincts that said to me “you’re done for now.”
We all have those intuitive moments but we often don’t respect them.

On another occasion I sat down at a blackjack table in Reno, NV with only 20 minutes before my airport ride arrived. So I placed $20 on the table and announced to the dealer, “Linda, we have only 20 minutes to build an empire, please deal the cards!” She smiled and dealt.
While I was at that table I won over $250! Then I got into the car and left.
Maybe it’s the short time frame that motivated me or just the knowledge that I wasn’t going to bet much, but I know for sure that I was controlling my attitude. And while I was controlling my attitude, I was in fact “luckier.”

It is my experience that self-confidence, that feeling of being able to handle what you are dealing with, is one of the most powerful emotions. A confident person attracts support. They gain cooperation from others and obstacles often disappear for them. Confident people seem to talk themselves out of traffic tickets more often than others do. They also get more dates and make more sales. Confidence is contagious and attractive. Others love to be around confident people.

Where does confidence come from? It comes from intention and honesty. Confidence is not blindly repeating “I think I can” and acting falsely. It is knowing that you can handle whatever happens; good or bad. It is also being not only willing, but insistent on knowing the truth about your situation and yourself. When we know the truth and are clear in what we want then our intentions guide us well.

Intention is another way of describing Goal Setting. In an earlier blog post I said that we need to tell the world what we want. Only then can it reorganize itself to bring us our desires. And it truly does. When we are clear on our intentions we tend to get the things we desire. It’s like using your car’s turn signals to let the rest of the world know where you intend to go, so that they can get out of the way, or help you.

What do you want? Take your time and be clear about what you want. Write it down. It helps.
Now, I just have one question for you, “do you feel lucky?”

By Jim Cathcart

The Acorn E-Letter is my weekly message that goes out to thousands worldwide who have signed up for the free subscription via my website Cathcart.com. In it I share a simple thought for the week along with some comments or a short story.

But for those that want access to more of my insights and discoveries, my Blogs are the best place to go. I currently have three Blogs, each with a different purpose.

•  Jim Cathcart’s Blog  (on Blogspot.com) is my “Personal” Blog. In it I share my news and views and interests and more. It contains a mixture of information on everything from Leadership to Motorcycling to Mountain Hiking to Motivation to California Wild Fires. Please subscribe to the RSS or Atom feed if you are interested in this and leave me your comments from time to time. I like staying connected with you.

• My Relationship Intelligence Blog (on WordPress.com) is the Blog for information on my books, research, professional development tips, motivational ideas and sales techniques. I’m writing a new book on this topic and much of it will be posted here for your review. I’d love your feedback.

• Blog number three is my Intelligent Motivation Blog (on blogspot.com). This one overlaps a bit with my Relationship Intelligence Blog mentioned above but it differs in that it focuses specifically on How to create and grow High Value Relationships. I’d like for it to be a forum for all of us to explore the best ways to turn our relationships into personal and financial assets.

• I’ve created an obscure fourth Blog on political topics at TownHall.com, the title of that Blog is “Thinking it Through“.

All of these are simply my attempts to offer you as much value as I can. I’m listed on Facebook, MySpace, LinkedIn, SynergyStreet, Plaxo, YouTube and much more. Where practical I’ve added resources you can access via those networks.
When you like what you see, just sign up for the RSS feed to “subscribe” to future posts and anytime you feel it’s too much for your inbox, just unsubscribe with a couple of easy clicks.
My goal is to have a large community of eager learners and active thinkers who would like to make the world a better place. Let’s get and stay connnected. Please let me know how to be of the most value to you.

And watch my posts for occasional freebies like the current $9.95 ebooks that are free through my recent post on my Relationship Intelligence Blog.

by Jim Cathcart
author of “Relationship Selling” and “The Eight Competencies of Relationship Selling”

In 1985 my first Relationship Selling book was published in hardcover and a few years later it came out in softcover with Putnam Berkley. Upon arrival it was met with skepticism. People asked, “how can selling and relationships coexist?” Well, today we laugh at that question as being incredibly naive.

But even today there are those who think of “Relationship Selling” as merely being nice to people while hoping for a sale. That, too, is incredibly naive.

A relationship is a connection between people in which value is exchanged. To make a sale without establishing a trusting relationship is to be merely a vending source. But to build a high-trust relationship with someone and to also make a sale puts you in the position to easily get all the future purchases from that person. In other words, with a relationship, one sale can be the beginning of a lifetime of orders.

A Mass Mutual sales trainer Doug Macdonald once told me, “Jim, for the first 5 years you are in sales you will be underpaid relative to how hard you work. But if you form the right habits and develop the right relationships you will be overpaid for the rest of your career.” How true!

We need to see “Relationship Selling” as what I originally described it as being: a form of business friendship. We should become the business equivalent of a good friend to our clients. When we seek to serve them in that way we will find that every year our sales will grow without us having to increase our sales efforts. We will build on each sale to expand our network of high-value relationships.

Please let me know anytime I can be helpful in your sales efforts. Jim Cathcart

By Jim Cathcart

You’ve seen a lot from me lately on “High-Value Relationships” and I haven’t even warmed up fully yet. The reason is, that phrase gave a new sense of meaning to everything else I’ve been teaching and writing about over these past 31 years.

• When I look at my books on Relationship Selling, they are not just about people skills, they are about intentionally and consciously creating relationships with positive potential. They are about the intelligent orchestration of your life’s relationships to get you closer to your “Desired Outcomes.”
• In my psychological research for The Acorn Principle I studied the impact and value of primary relationships and how they make us who we are.
• My television show on TSTN.com is titled “The Purpose of Selling”, which is: “To build mutually profitable relationships.”
• As I’ve become more involved in my community and the country club I belong to, it has become obvious to me that the approach I’ve taken to the establishment and expansion of High-Value Relationships has been of great value to my reputation and my business as well as my social life.
• When I review my calendar to see how I’ve spent my time over the past few years I see lots of evidence that the conscious and intentional approach to “Relationships as Assets” has led me to some great friendships and many happy moments.

Your life is a series of relationships and the more intentional and conscious you are about the formation and development of them, the more likely you will be to reach your goals.

What is Relationship Intelligence ™?
It is taking an intelligent approach to the selection, cultivation and maintenance of your connections with others. It means weeding out the relationships that take value away from you and building on those that bring you value. Another way to look at it is; Treating Relationships as Assets. You look at your social circle, business circle, family circle and other key connections with an eye toward your Desired Outcomes (goals.) If a relationship contributes to your advancement or enhances your life you preserve it. If it doesn’t then you change it or eliminate it. It is being conscious and intentional about your connections with others. (I’ll be repeating this phrase often.)

Isn’t that kind of mercenary and uncaring?
Not at all. You do it every day. When you see someone who looks angry, dangerous or scary then you avoid them. If you have to deal with them in order to get what you need then you simply manage the interaction carefully and then move on to people you like to be with. I’m simply suggesting that you take that conscious and intentional approach to a higher level and start applying it to all of your relationships.

What is a High-Value Relationship (HVR)?
A High-Value Relationship is one in which both participants receive substantial benefits.
This could be mutual support, friendship, business referrals, revenue, sales, intellectual stimulation, spiritual inspiration or any number of other benefits. The key is that YOU consider the effects to be valuable and so does the other person. Each person is fully in charge of their own determination of value.

Does it have to be a business relationship?
Certainly not. A marriage is a High-Value Relationship and so is a teacher-student relationship. As long as both parties gain from it.

Why do I need HVRs?
Because relationships are the essence of your life and the more of them that are HVRs the more you will get what you want from life. If all you do is hang out with people who don’t care about you and who have no joy then your life will suck. Count on it. So, be intentional in choosing who you invest your energy and time with.

What are the qualities of a HVR?
There are three essential qualities in every high value relationship: 1. both parties are committed to the success of the relationship (it can’t be one sided), 2. there must be enough trust for the truth to flow freely, and 3. both of you need to understand what you can expect from the other person. You need clear agreements.

Do relationships have a life expectancy?
Interesting question, yes, relationships have life cycles related to their purpose for existence but many relationships evolve into broader areas and become even more important than originally intended. Likewise, some relationships that started off as vitally important tend to fade over time.

How do I know which relationships to invest in?
You don’t usually. So it is best to be optimistic about all your contacts with others. Who knows, the clerk who serves you today may be the son of the business executive who gives you the opportunity of a lifetime tomorrow. Emerson said, “Everyone in some way is my superior, in that I can learn from him.” A good attitude to hold.

What gives a relationship its value?
Your Desired Outcome determines the value potential of your relationships. If you want to become the Mayor of your city, many relationships suddenly become important to you. If you want a sale, the potential buyer becomes more important to you. And the degree to which you also can be valuable to the buyer or voter will determine whether there is a relationship or merely a transaction between you.

How can I reasonably treat all my relationships as HVRs?
You can’t. So the starting point is your “Inner Circle.” This is the 5 to 12 people who you get your major results through at this time. Think about who you work with most closely and rely upon most. These few people represent your “team.” If they are championship-level people then you have high capacity for performance. If they don’t possess much talent or skill then your success is currently inhibited.
Take a close look at who is in your present Inner Circle and assess what each brings to the party. If you are missing some vital abilities then Go Shopping! Find some people to bring actively into your life and begin to cultivate your relationships with them.

What is a relationship?
Another really good question! You hear a lot of admonitions to build relationships so it is important to define what one is. I believe that a relationship is a connection between people in which value is exchanged. The greater the value they exchange the stronger the relationship tends to be. Value could be encouragement, education, purchasing goods or services, support, love, or collaboration. The partici
pants are the ones who determine the value.

For more on this topic, please explore the posts on my Relationship Intelligence Blog. I’d really enjoy hearing your thoughts on this topic too. Leave me a comment here, drop me an email or give me a call if I can be helpful to you.

By Jim Cathcart

OK, I just have to tell you about this one. On May 30th I’ll be speaking for the San Diego chapter of the National Speakers Association, my colleagues. NSA is a 4,000 member professional society with chapters all over the world. For 20 years I lived in San Diego and I’ve been honored to have the chapter’s member-of-the-year award named “The Jim Cathcart Service Award.”
So, these are my “peeps”, friends and colleagues I’ve known for years.

Well, on Friday the 30th I’m going to play guitar and sing to them! Yep, I’ll deliver a speech and then pick up my guitar and do a couple of hours of oldies in a sing-along concert. You may be aware that I play and sing for 1/2 hour or more every day, so this is a happy extension of my hobby into my “work.” Here is a link to my blog post about Rock n Roll & Guitars.

The following is NSA San Diego’s program announcement. If you are in the area and would like to attend the event please send them an email and they can let you know if there’s still room. Though the meeting is for “NSA members only”, I am permitted a few guests.

Program: “Jim Cathcart Un-Plugged:
A Unique Evening of Education & Entertainment”

Date: Friday, May 30

Time: 6:30pm to 9:30pm

Location: Chapter president Karyn Buxman’s home-and-concert-hall.

Directions: Mapquest link is provided online: www.NSASD.org

Travel note: Watch for nearby construction on La Jolla Blvd.

Dress: California casual

Cost: $35 per person. Such a deal.

Dinner: Heavy hors d’oeuvres & wine will be served.

Note: This is an NSA-members only event.

Registration: Pre-registration required. Register online at http://www.nsasd.org/events/member.htm

“Jim Cathcart Un-Plugged: A Unique Evening of Education & Entertainment”

(1) Presentation: “Finding, Developing & Re-Creating Your Brand”

(2) A “concert/sing-along” with Jim Cathcart on acoustic guitar

(3) Heavy hors d’oeuvres & wine

Join your speaker friends at our May chapter meeting, as we host the incomparable Jim Cathcart as he makes a rare Southern California appearance.

RE: THE PRESENTATION: “FINDING, DEVELOPING & RE-CREATING YOUR BRAND”

After a phenomenally successful 31 years in the speaking biz, Jim Cathcart is re-creating his brand. Huh?!? Wouldn’t you like to find out WHY he’s doing it . . . and how YOU can re-create your brand to enhance your success?

Jim will discuss:

• • How to build a career position that gets better with each phase
  • Selecting your best topic
  • Naming your products and speeches
  • Positioning yourself for your chosen markets
  • Reinventing yourself every few years
  • Staying current and exploring the cutting edge

RE: THE “CONCERT/SING-ALONG”

• • Jim is an accomplished amateur singer/guitarist.
  • He’ll be playing favorites from the 1960s, 70s & 80s.
  • Singing along is not required . . . but the peer pressure WILL be intense.

BIO

Jim Cathcart moved from Arkansas and Oklahoma to La Jolla in 1983. He was a “motivational speaker” who had just created a new partnership with USD college professor Dr. Tony Alessandra. Jim joined NSA in 1976 and was presenting more than 120 speeches a year by 1982. For five years (1980-85) he and Tony built Cathcart, Alessandra and Associates into a very successful business. Then they went back to being separate businesses while still occasionally co-authoring and collaborating.

Jim has authored 14 books with major publishers, and has sold millions of dollars worth of his audio programs with Nightingale-Conant and others. He served as NSA’s national president in 1988-89. He created NSA’s Professional Competencies program and he has received the following awards and designations: CSP, CPAE/Speaker Hall of Fame, The Cavett Award, GLAC’s Lifetime Achievement Award, Toastmasters International’s “Golden Gavel” Award, and he will receive the “Legends of the Platform Award” this summer.

As the author of the original Relationship Selling book Jim received worldwide acclaim; and his book The Acorn Principle is a national bestseller. He was one of the first five speakers in NSA to create a video demo; he has pioneered in many other areas as well.

Today Jim lives in Lake Sherwood, California-just over the hill from Malibu near Thousand Oaks; his administrative operations are handled by SpeakersOffice, Inc. in Carlsbad. He is an avid trail runner and mountain hiker, sport touring motorcyclist (he’s toured the Alps twice on a BMW) and a singer/guitarist. At age 61 he is more fit and fun than at any point in his life, and he’s still as excited about speaking as ever!

NSA San Diego renamed its Member of the Year Award the “Jim Cathcart Service Award” in recognition of his many years of support to this chapter and our profession.

Jim’s main website is www.Cathcart.com and his blog is http://relationshipintelligenceblog.com.

REGISTER NOW FOR OUR MAY MEETING!

• • Friday, May 30, 6:30pm to 9:30pm
  • This is an NSA members-only event.
  • Only $35. Includes hors d’oeuvres & wine, presentation & concert.

Register online on this website. http://www.nsasd.org/events/member.htm

Questions? Contact chapter Program Chair Greg Godek:

• • 858-456-7177
  • GregGodek@aol.com

Bring your questions, your notepad, your curiosity and your spirit of fun to see Jim Cathcart in a rare musical appearance, as he rejoins us here in San Diego once again for an evening of learning and music!

======================================

by Jim Cathcart
copyright 2008

At the Tulsa agency of Massachusetts Mutual Life Insurance Company in the late 1970s the general agent was Joe D. Willard. In a matter of just a few years he turned this agency around from near failure to winning the President’s Trophy twice in a five year period as one of the best out of 120+ agencies. I had the privilege of being “in on” that achievement.

Joe had hired me to conduct a seminar on goal setting for his agents in 1976 and he asked me to join his team in 1977 as an adviser and sales coach. Though my chosen path was professional speaking and consulting, he offered me an office and a monthly retainer to be his agency’s in-house sales coach and his personal confidant. What I learned in my six years with this account was invaluable.

One particular story stands out. Joe Willard had been a company leader for Mass Mutual in group insurance sales before taking over the Tulsa life Agency. So I asked him, “what do you do?” His reply was immediate, he said, “Do you remember the book PsychoCybernetics?”
I said, “Yes, it was written by Dr. Maxwell Maltz and it focused on ‘Self-Image’.” “That’s right,” Joe said. “In the book he said you should think like the person you want to become. So I did that and asked myself each day, ‘How would the sales leader do this work?’ It gave me the point of view and the motivation I needed, so I made more sales. Now I do the same thing as the General Agent and ask how the company’s leading agency would do what we are about to do.”

I was very impressed. Here was a man using a simple principle in the form of a question and with it he had lifted himself to excellence in sales and subsequently his agency to the top of the industry. I started talking about that in my speeches and as others adopted the practice they too were getting impressive results. One notable example, about whom I’ve written in my other books, is Tim Seward whose use of this daily question transformed his one-man auto-detailing business and his career into multi-millionaire status.

Now I offer it to you. Here is my suggestion: capture the graphic at the top of this article and look at it every day. Think about the goals you wish to achieve and then ask yourself several times a day, “How would the person (who had achieved these goals) I’d like to be do the things I’m about to do?”
The question will change your mindset from the present to the future YOU. Then you will be behaving as the person you wish to become instead of merely the person you are right now.
This simple mind shift has the potential to transform your life much as it has Joe Willard’s, Tim Seward’s and my own.

For more information on this check out my book or audio album “The Acorn Principle” at www.cathcart.com.

By Jim Cathcart

You’ve seen a lot from me lately on “High-Value Relationships” and I haven’t even warmed up fully yet. The reason is, that phrase gave a new sense of meaning to everything else I’ve been teaching and writing about over these past 31 years.

• When I look at my books on Relationship Selling, they are not just about people skills, they are about intentionally and consciously creating relationships with positive potential. They are about the intelligent orchestration of your life’s relationships to get you closer to your “Desired Outcomes.”
• In my psychological research for The Acorn Principle I studied the impact and value of primary relationships and how they make us who we are.
• My television show on TSTN.com is titled “The Purpose of Selling”, which is: “To build mutually profitable relationships.”
• As I’ve become more involved in my community and the country club I belong to, it has become obvious to me that the approach I’ve taken to the establishment and expansion of High-Value Relationships has been of great value to my reputation and my business as well as my social life.
• When I review my calendar to see how I’ve spent my time over the past few years I see lots of evidence that the conscious and intentional approach to “Relationships as Assets” has led me to some great friendships and many happy moments.

Your life is a series of relationships and the more intentional and conscious you are about the formation and development of them, the more likely you will be to reach your goals.

What is Relationship Intelligence ™?
It is taking an intelligent approach to the selection, cultivation and maintenance of your connections with others. It means weeding out the relationships that take value away from you and building on those that bring you value. Another way to look at it is; Treating Relationships as Assets. You look at your social circle, business circle, family circle and other key connections with an eye toward your Desired Outcomes (goals.) If a relationship contributes to your advancement or enhances your life you preserve it. If it doesn’t then you change it or eliminate it. It is being conscious and intentional about your connections with others. (I’ll be repeating this phrase often.)

Isn’t that kind of mercenary and uncaring?
Not at all. You do it every day. When you see someone who looks angry, dangerous or scary then you avoid them. If you have to deal with them in order to get what you need then you simply manage the interaction carefully and then move on to people you like to be with. I’m simply suggesting that you take that conscious and intentional approach to a higher level and start applying it to all of your relationships.

What is a High-Value Relationship (HVR)?
A High-Value Relationship is one in which both participants receive substantial benefits.
This could be mutual support, friendship, business referrals, revenue, sales, intellectual stimulation, spiritual inspiration or any number of other benefits. The key is that YOU consider the effects to be valuable and so does the other person. Each person is fully in charge of their own determination of value.

Does it have to be a business relationship?
Certainly not. A marriage is a High-Value Relationship and so is a teacher-student relationship. As long as both parties gain from it.

Why do I need HVRs?
Because relationships are the essence of your life and the more of them that are HVRs the more you will get what you want from life. If all you do is hang out with people who don’t care about you and who have no joy then your life will suck. Count on it. So, be intentional in choosing who you invest your energy and time with.

What are the qualities of a HVR?
There are three essential qualities in every high value relationship: 1. both parties are committed to the success of the relationship (it can’t be one sided), 2. there must be enough trust for the truth to flow freely, and 3. both of you need to understand what you can expect from the other person. You need clear agreements.

Do relationships have a life expectancy?
Interesting question, yes, relationships have life cycles related to their purpose for existence but many relationships evolve into broader areas and become even more important than originally intended. Likewise, some relationships that started off as vitally important tend to fade over time.

How do I know which relationships to invest in?
You don’t usually. So it is best to be optimistic about all your contacts with others. Who knows, the clerk who serves you today may be the son of the business executive who gives you the opportunity of a lifetime tomorrow. Emerson said, “Everyone in some way is my superior, in that I can learn from him.” A good attitude to hold.

What gives a relationship its value?
Your Desired Outcome determines the value potential of your relationships. If you want to become the Mayor of your city, many relationships suddenly become important to you. If you want a sale, the potential buyer becomes more important to you. And the degree to which you also can be valuable to the buyer or voter will determine whether there is a relationship or merely a transaction between you.

How can I reasonably treat all my relationships as HVRs?
You can’t. So the starting point is your “Inner Circle.” This is the 5 to 12 people who you get your major results through at this time. Think about who you work with most closely and rely upon most. These few people represent your “team.” If they are championship-level people then you have high capacity for performance. If they don’t possess much talent or skill then your success is currently inhibited.
Take a close look at who is in your present Inner Circle and assess what each brings to the party. If you are missing some vital abilities then Go Shopping! Find some people to bring actively into your life and begin to cultivate your relationships with them.

What is a relationship?
Another really good question! You hear a lot of admonitions to build relationships so it is important to define what one is. I believe that a relationship is a connection between people in which value is exchanged. The greater the value they e
xchange the stronger the relationship tends to be. Value could be encouragement, education, purchasing goods or services, support, love, or collaboration. The participants are the ones who determine the value.

For more on this topic, please explore the posts on my Relationship Intelligence Blog. I’d really enjoy hearing your thoughts on this topic too. Leave me a comment here, drop me an email or give me a call if I can be helpful to you.

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